but where is the cheese?
Dear hot people,It would really help me out if you could stop being so sexy. Seriously. You know the people I'm talking about. It's those people who are just so goddamned sexy/hot/attractive who walk around nonchalantly, explicitly exhibiting their natural beauty, being super distracting.
Is it not wholly satisfying enough for you to just be hot? Do you have to cause me to lose a few precious seconds as I do a double-take? It would also be uber helpful if you could always sit toward the back of the class (preferably completely behind me) so that my eyes don't just naturally drift toward you and your kind. Even better, it would be extremely helpful if when you go out to walk around and shop, walk, or whatever, that you slather your face in grease and wear mismatched clothes so as to de-sexy-ize yourself.
You hot people already have tons going for you.
- More-attractive people tend to have more-educated spouses (more-attractive people tend to "marry up," regarding education).
- Attractive people tend to marry other attractive people (although men tend to get the better deal).
- Attractive people tend to have better job prospects.
Obviously, the list of "hot" advantages could go on and on.Therefore, I sincerely believe that it would be most favorable to all parties involved if sexy people just stopped being sexy all the fucking time. They should be required to go out of their way to do so. Dating would be like a lottery; one would figure out they nabbed a hottie only after the fact (of marriage or feelings or what-have-you). The uglies would have a more-equal chance of attaining a job. Productivity would go waaay up. Of course, these are just speculations.
So, hot people, please stop being hot.
Yours truly,
Timmy
P.S. I thought it was amusing to include two random pictures of attractive people who decided to put their arms up to explicitly (and maybe unintentionally) exponentiate their sex appeal factors.
Also, unrelated but super-hilarious music video! This is "Danger! High Voltage" by Electric Six:
Haha this is so true. It's a good thing I sit at the front of the class. An attractive teacher would put a damper on that plan though. I always turn around when I hear someone walk in though so I still know where they are. Sneaky bastards. They definitely do it on purpose though.
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